


Scattered

by Dillbugg



Series: Pieces in a Puzzle Box (Dream SMP Recovery AU) [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: <—that is a joke, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, I'm sorryyyyy, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Recovery, Schlatt would be equally abusive even if Tubbo were older, Toby Smith | Tubbo-centric, it's okay I’m a great writer, its gonna hurt for awhile, my beta is just my friend who isn’t even into mcyt, not like real life drugs, only child abuse bc Tubbo is technically a minor, sorry theydies, the comfort comes later in the series, the very beginning of the recovery process, there is a lot going on with Schlatt manipulating Tubbo using potions and stuff, when i tag this for drugs i mean potions lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27614183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dillbugg/pseuds/Dillbugg
Summary: It really all goes to shit when Tubbo’s house gets broken into. But that was months ago. Now, it’s all snowballed into a terrible, overwhelming mess and now Wilbur’s dead and Tubbo’s the one in prison for it.Or;“Fuck you Tubbo.” The man outside of his cell rasps, like the scratch of a music disk starting up in the jukebox. There’s a connection there, one so easily made if he could just muster the energy to make it. But still, nothing.The world is overlapped by static. He suddenly remembers that conversations work two ways.“I don’t even know who you are.” Tubbo drones, mindlessly.There’s nothing but the angry crunch of boots as the man leaves, and with him goes the static. The world is calm and he can breath again.Sometimes recovery isn’t possible until you discover that you want it.
Relationships: Floris | Fundy & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot
Series: Pieces in a Puzzle Box (Dream SMP Recovery AU) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2018948
Comments: 2
Kudos: 183
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	Scattered

His brain is scattered, bashed and battered away by President Schlatt's taunts and lies. Maybe that's why Tubbo doesn't feel anything even as he struggles to unsheath his sword from the body it has found itself buried in.

Maybe that's why, when he sees Tommy raging from where he stands against Schlatt's people, cronies and soldiers alike, he doesn't understand at first. He's been good! He's done what was asked of him!

_How could you? He loved you Tubbo, he loved you!_ It echoes in his ears, and Tubbo can’t make it stop. He’s never wanted to cut his own ears off more than now.

And Tubbo doesn't get it yet. He's been good, what is Tommy even yelling about? He's been good, right?

There's sticky red on his hands, like strawberry jam, and he expects a sweetness to greet his nose, reminiscent of summer nights. Instead, his eyes go watery as the stench of iron and decay hit him like a wall. And finally, finally, Tubbo realizes. He's forgotten he's not the only one who can bleed.

He looks down to the ground, and sees Wilbur's face, ashy and pale and frozen in a glassy eyed expression of shock. He's dead, Tubbo realizes, and Tommy's still screaming, his voice reaching the register where his words do little more than a cheese grater can to his ears. 

Wilbur's dead, and his own sword is dripping with still warm blood, but how could this have happened? He was good.

***

It starts with the creaking of his home late at night, something in the far corners of his house making far too much noise for it to be an accident. So, he goes around, checks that each and every window is shut and firmly latched. Checks that the doors are firmly locked, then he puts out all of the torches and crawls back in bed.

He's drifting, enjoying the feeling of weightlessness as his mind slips away to join the current of sleep, when he's abruptly slammed back into the land of the living by a crash, the sound of metal on metal, from just outside his room.

So, he leaps out of bed, speedily lights a lantern and cautiously opens the door to his room, looking for the cause of the sound. And he smells it before he spots it, the acrid, bitter smell of burning wood. And his eyes silently find the weakly lit torch on the floor next to one of his chests, one that just so happens to be full of paper and wool and other various things.

After he cleans up the mess, and checks the damage, (only a handful of singed papers, none of them completely ruined) he realizes that... he put all of the torches out earlier.

But surely he made a mistake and just didn't realize that one was still smoldering enough to restart itself?

He checks all the doors once again. One is unlocked.

***

Wilbur is dead, he sees it as stark as the blood dripping down the dazzling white of the sword’s iron blade, but the pathway between eyes and brain has carried that information off before he has the chance to fully realize. Instead, he looks to where Techno and Tommy are still both locked in battle, unable to find an opening to take and aid their fallen president.

With a jolt, Tubbo realizes he's badly hurt too, far too low to go on fighting or anything strenuous without blurring vision and deadweight limbs. He grabs the neck of a bottle from inside his jacket, uncorks it with trembling hands and as he lifts it to his lips, it slips out of his grip and shatters on the ground, the terrible sound of glass echoing in his ears.

Surely he won't get in trouble for this little slip. He was so good. Followed Schlatt's orders perfectly.

But he watches the glass and its unmoving gleam. He's mesmerized, watching as thousands of tiny suns reflect on each shard.

Then, the moments over and he smoothly pulls his second and final potion from his jacket pocket and downs it in one go.

His insides get all fuzzy and warm and he feels a renewed strength surge through him.

The battle rages behind him, but on the horizon he sees a cloaked figure riding towards Manberg at a furious speed. Eret, he recognizes from the direction and the rich red cloak. He brings his communicator up to his mouth and sends a message to Schlatt.

"Eret’s approaching and looks like he could cause trouble."

He waits a second, watches Eret atop his horse slowly and steadily becoming larger, closer.

His communicator crackles to life, "Tubbo, you've done well, join me in my bunker. You have four minutes." Schlatt's voice orders and Tubbo scrambles to go, four minutes is not nearly enough time to get to the bunker, but he'll have to make due. He wouldn't want Schlatt to be disappointed.

***

He brings up the fact that he cant sleep to Schlatt only once he has no other choice. He's been dozing during meetings, making simple mistakes during potion brewing, and forgetting every third thing anyone says to him.

It's a disaster.

"Oh, Tubbo, Tubbo, Tubbo..." Schlatt says in a mockingly thoughtful voice, stroking his chin. He's slouching back in his chair, one leg crossed over the other the perfect picture of relaxed, even in his sleek black suit.

"Yknow, it's almost like you want to mess up," He says, looking out the window, his deep voice sends a foreboding chill up Tubbo's spine.

"Schlatt, I swear it's-"

"Tubbo, it's like you're sabotaging me or something, y'know?" Tubbo is shocked into silence, and a deep fear rattles him as he takes a wheezing breath.

"I'm not, I just. I can't, I can't," and he stops because he realizes how stupid he's about to sound. He can barely function because he can't sleep? It sounds like something a toddler would say, and Tubbo knows firsthand Schlatt's bias on whining toddlers.

"What was that Tubbo?" Schlatt asks, leaning forward suddenly, eyes intently fixed on his face.

Tubbo feels his lip start to quiver but bites the inside of his cheek to quell the urge to cry.

"I cant sleep is all, Sir." He says, and he might as well be crying because he sounds all choked up and his voice is rough.

Schlatt leans back and Tubbo wilts just a little, some out of fear and some out of relief. Schlatt taps a finger against his cheek, looking overly thoughtful, then goes on to fiddle with the end of his curling goat's horn.

"Y'know," He says, with a smile to sly to be comforting, "I might have just the thing."

***

"Tubbo." A soft and delicate voice speaks up and this voice is new, one that he hasn't heard for days now. Fundy himself stands outside the locked room, Tubbo can barely make out his silhouette through the tiny barred window in the door.

"It's time to prepare for your trial." He says, and Tubbo can only blink slowly. He just wants to go back to sleep.

The iron door creaks open, then turns into a grating screech. Fundy winces, his orange fox ears pressing back and teeth gritting.

Then, he spots the untouched food tray right in the middle of the floor, where he left it last night at dinner time.

"Tubbo..." Fundy sighs, and it grates Tubbo's nerves, the disappointment in his tone, "You need to be eating, this isn't healthy."

Tubbo shrugs, "Okay," he says.

"Alright, come along, then." Fundy says and helps him up to his feet and leads him out of the tiny locked room even though Tubbo is swaying on his feet and little specks of black wash in and out of his vision.

He's sat down in a chair in a warm room he doesn't recognize and there's a sea of faces he cant understand, but at least he's out of that tiny room he's been stuck in.

A woman sitting on an elevated part of the room wearing a black robe stands and a hush sweeps through the room.

"Ladies, gentlemen and otherwise assorted guests, we are gathered to begin the trial of Tubbo, previous secretary of state of the country of L'Manberg for his crimes of war against the Pogtopia rebellion party.

"All parties must abide by all regulations of the courtroom at all times, and with that, will the defendant please call his first witness."

Fundy stands up at that, and Tubbo is still reeling from the volume of the woman's voice. Fundy thumps some papers on the desk, straightening them in his hands.

"I will first call Niki Achu to the stand to begin to testify in the defense of my client." Fundy says and sweeps an arm to his right. Niki stands up from the bench she was sitting at and walks calmly to the stand.

Tubbo blinks unsteadily. He hasn't seen Schlatt yet, he wonders what his next orders will be. And he wonders why he hasn't given Tubbo anymore sleeping potions yet.

He has no orders, he has no purpose, so he slumps back in his chair, staring unblinkingly at Niki and lets the sound of the room all blend together into a singular hum. He'll be good until Schlatt gets back.

***

Tommy visits him, in secret of course. Tommy speaks vaguely of where Wilbur and him are, some cave or another, they've been gathering resources, gearing up, playing the waiting game to find out who is a true ally.

The fact that Wilbur hasn't even reached out to Niki and Tommy has shown up to Tubbo's home in person speaks volumes of just how much Tommy trusts him. And Tubbo's honored by that trust because Tommy very much has the emotional walls of a feral animal, with a brain that's so incredibly busy that when something doesn't occupy it, it turns against him and sends him spiraling.

"So, big man," Tommy smiles with a forced relaxation, "How're things going under Schlatt's thumb up here in Manberg,"

Yet, here he is, despite the doubts that probably occupy his headspace, doubts that taunt him with the possibility that Tubbo will betray him.

"Eh, not great. Schlatt's a scary guy, and y'know I think I have a ghost haunting my house," Tubbo says, trying to stay nonchalant about the 'ghost,' he doesn't want to stress Tommy out about his house creaking at night.

Tommy is terrified of being betrayed, ever since Eret, and Tubbo is terrified for him too. Because even though he's never seen it, he can visualize in his mind exactly where the scar would be from that ambush, can see its jagged forks like a lick of lightning across a stormy sky. He was the one who helped Fundy dig the barbs attached to the arrow out of his flesh.

There's a lightning shaped scar on Tommy's back, just left of his right shoulder blade, barely clear of his spine. And that scar is all the binding he needs to his promise, all he's ever needed. And his promise; he will never betray Tommy, no matter what. They're brothers, they're by each other's side until the end of the line.

He won't betray his brother, would hate to hurt Wilbur, or Fundy, or Niki, and even Eret, but Tommy is his best friend. Tommy is his first priority, and as long as he had control of himself, he would never betray Tommy.

***

“I can't fucking believe you, Tubbo,” and he doesn’t recognize the speaker, but he recalls a familiarity in the voice, yet the sadness is foreign to his ears.

He feels like he should know exactly who speaks to him, but the man continues to speak - _and you just what, bend to anyone’s will now, do you? You had one job -_ and Tubbo’s mind continues to drown in the fog.

“Um,” Tubbo croaks out, and the man stops, dead silent. His hands tremble in his lap and his stomach cramps in pain, even as he ignores the platter of food on the stone floor just a meter from where he lays. He pinches the flesh of his thumb on his palm and forces the words out of his sticky throat, “Who are you?”

There is nothing all of the sudden. The silence crashes over Tubbo and he wonders, for a thrilling second if this is it. Will this be where he dies? The silence is even worse than the yelling, and Tubbo feels like he is ready. Just a little bit ready to die. To let go, is more of it though.

He’s so, so tired of sorting through the fog in his head, and trying to decide why certain memories feel lacking, why some feel artificial, why he feels like some are absent.

“Fuck you Tubbo.” The man outside of his cell rasps, like the scratch of a music disk starting up in the jukebox. There’s a connection there, one so easily made if he could just muster the energy to make it. But still, nothing.

The world is overlapped by static. He suddenly remembers that conversations work two ways.

“I don’t even know who you are.” Tubbo drones, mindlessly.

There’s nothing but the angry crunch of boots as the man leaves, and with him goes the static. The world is calm and he can breath again.

Sometimes recovery isn’t possible until you discover that you want it.

**Author's Note:**

> Ayyyy thanks for reading :) if you look at all the names of the parts together under the Puzzle Box series, you’ll see they’re all very intertwined.
> 
> Any and all feedback appreciated!!
> 
> Edit: fixed some format stuff lol, feel free to point out anything that looks funky :)


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